Last week I had a rough week. I messed up at work and didn’t treat someone especially gracefully. Basically I’ve been shunned from working the front desk at the Y. I was beating myself up for acting poorly and beating myself up for beating myself up.
That same weekend I had another situation happen with relationships. I’ve made friends with this family at the JCC. A wife and husband and their daughters. I train their daughter. The husband showed me a messaging app he uses that can be encrypted. We started chatting on it. We were chatting back and forth and at one point I made a kinda racist joke. The message was shown as read, then no response. Ok… He got busy. That was Saturday. Sunday, work thing happened. Sunday I also check our chat to see if I missed a notification… He was completely gone off my friends list. It almost looked like he blocked me. I go into full panic mode.
What if I upset him? What will happen at the gym? Will I get in trouble? Will it be awkward? I shouldn’t have texted him in the first place. What is happening with all my relationships. This is the devil’s voice not mine. He came to steal kill and destroy. I guess I’ll find a new family. Man, why can’t you find good people who will just tell you when you screwed up instead of vanishing and making it awkward? I shouldn’t have been texting him in the first place. I have a strict rule about messaging men one on one in serious relationships.
I text his wife that Sunday to see if I’m still training her daughter. No answer. Monday comes, when I normally see them, and she calls! Leaves a message and says she wants me to still train and they had the flu that week! So I’m still thinking to myself… What if he didn’t tell her? I concluded it was for the best. Now I don’t have to worry about my rule.
I worked yesterday again… Still no family. I texted her to invite her to Bootcamp. She texted me and tells me she would but she’s going to Colorado. Next thing I know she’s texting me through the app asking me if I still used it! And I said yes, and she said oh because my husband’s been looking for you! He bought a new phone and couldn’t find you.
We all end up chatting together and he says “I thought I upset you” and said “I thought I upset you!”
That devil, he’s into playing games big time.
Now… About my rule and not messaging men in serious relationships…